Monday, April 11, 2011


So, I just learned that April is National Poetry Month. What a great coincidence! This is THE month I just so happen to be teaching poetry in ALL my classes (in my literature class, we're analyzing it; in my Creative Writing class, they're writing it).

In honor of this, I'll post one of my (rare) poems here. It was the only poem I've ever had published (in a university journal, years ago). It's about a miscarriage I had back in 1998. Sorry about the sad tone/theme, but I find I only write poetry when I'm sad. Or frustrated. So, here goes:

A Changing Tide

A definite pink line,

An ecstatic squeal as I prepare to tell the world.

I am pregnant.

A delirious rush, adjusting to the thought

That something is growing inside.

Books bought, names considered,

A future planned.

But a grievous flicker in the doctor's eyes

Frightens me.

Two days spent not thinking about

What I know is happening, a changing tide.

We wait.

Finally, mercifully, the tragic truth is told.

I am numb.

Pregnant, then suddenly unpregnant.

Swept away, no time to adjust to either.

A death no one could see.

No funeral, no casket,

Only the somber reflection

Of a mother

No longer a mother.


  1. What a beautiful, heartbreaking and BRAVE poem, Traci. Thank you for sharing it with us.

  2. Thanks, Samantha - it was really cathartic for me, and a few other friends of mine who've had miscarriages were able to connect with it. I love how poetry, more than any other form, can be so raw and personal (which is probably why I don't write it that often, lol).

  3. I have no words.
    My wife wrote a poem or two when we had a miscarriage. It was a horrible time.

  4. Thanks for your post, Andrew. I'm sorry for your loss. Yes, poetry was a good outlet for me during that time. That, and crying a LOT. A miscarriage is such a different sort of grieving, I think. It's sort of invisible (hence, my "death no one could see" line), but it felt (and was) so real. My baby actually would've turned 12 years old last month...

  5. Yes, it is real, but people who haven't been through that just don't understand. Ours was right at the end of the first trimester, and my wife almost died from it. Ours would have been about the same age. I'm also sorry for your loss.

  6. I'm so glad your wife is okay - sounds like it was super-traumatic, with her in danger that way.

    Mine happened at 8 weeks. I remember vividly that 5 minutes after I was told the news at the doctor's office, I went to pay for the visit, and there stood a HUGE pregnant girl paying too -- she was totally healthy, probably at her 9th month. And she couldn't have been more than 16 years old (unplanned pregnancy). I just had to look away. I didn't begrudge her of a healthy child, of course, but the irony of her standing there was so painful...